![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
[From here.]
Bruce wasn't going to call back about this issue. Clearly it was an issue for the authorities.
"Hello. I'd like to give an anonymous tip. I've come to understand that somebody in town is looking to punch a kitten. Repeatedly. I don't have a name, but the suspect is male. So please be on the look-out for a boy who looks like he wants a cat-fight, if you will."
"I trust you'll use this information appropriately."
Bruce wasn't going to call back about this issue. Clearly it was an issue for the authorities.
"Hello. I'd like to give an anonymous tip. I've come to understand that somebody in town is looking to punch a kitten. Repeatedly. I don't have a name, but the suspect is male. So please be on the look-out for a boy who looks like he wants a cat-fight, if you will."
"I trust you'll use this information appropriately."
"Hello, Ms Pryde. This is Phil Coulson. You may remember me from last week. I know this is short notice, but I'd like to use the back room at Caritas for an Olympic viewing party tomorrow. It seems like a good place to have some drinks and show blind nationalism in sports."
"Please let me know if we can make this happen as soon as possible. I just opened Photoshop and I'd like to post flyers around town ASAP if it's happening. Thank you."
"Please let me know if we can make this happen as soon as possible. I just opened Photoshop and I'd like to post flyers around town ASAP if it's happening. Thank you."
Maybe Topher had Kitty's phone number through legitimate game-night-planning means. Maybe he had it because he had tech skillz at his disposal. It would always be a mystery.
Unless someone asked him, probably.
Anyway, it was booze night, the night of ill-advised texts, and so:
LiVE ACTION ANGRY BIRDS NEXT GAME NIGHT Y/Y?
Topher, don't take away the thing that made Warren special.
Unless someone asked him, probably.
Anyway, it was booze night, the night of ill-advised texts, and so:
LiVE ACTION ANGRY BIRDS NEXT GAME NIGHT Y/Y?
Topher, don't take away the thing that made Warren special.
And sadly, Kitty wasn't used to drunk texts.
Kitty had sort of failed at treating college like a college student.
Like with real birds?
Kitty had sort of failed at treating college like a college student.
Like with real birds?
no like with warren, Topher explained. he"s an x-man with wings.
That was helpful! Wasn't that helpful?
That was helpful! Wasn't that helpful?
Yeah, I know him. I don't know that Warren'd be cool with that...
Topher's response was just a picture of Warren flying toward a wall. Doing the whole Angry Bird thing.
Soooo... yeah.
Soooo... yeah.
So! Guess who hadn't expected that!
WTF ARE YOU GUYS DOING?
Said she who'd never had a guy slingshot her at a monster or anything before, really.
WTF ARE YOU GUYS DOING?
Said she who'd never had a guy slingshot her at a monster or anything before, really.
LIVE ACTION AGRNRY BIRDS LIKE I SAID OMGGG
Topher, the all-caps was one thing. The spelling was another.
Topher, the all-caps was one thing. The spelling was another.
Edited 2012-08-16 01:25 (UTC)
Willingly???
Again, like she'd never done something like it, but it was for work, which totally made it better.
Again, like she'd never done something like it, but it was for work, which totally made it better.
yup! See, it was legit, Kitty! do you want to play cuz i think drinking nights are guys only but if we did it OFFICIALLY you could like phase everywhere. to cheat.
...Probably not.
...Probably not.
She could walk on air...
Wait, you guys are drinking and throwing Warren at walls? This sounds ill-advised.
Wait, you guys are drinking and throwing Warren at walls? This sounds ill-advised.
What, did she think his spelling was this bad all the ti-- okay, that held up.
ITS OKAY, Topher promised. WARREN IS DRINKING TO.O
That made it okay. Yes.
ITS OKAY, Topher promised. WARREN IS DRINKING TO.O
That made it okay. Yes.
Topher did not seem the type to edit all his typos, let's say.
Oh that helps.
She did not think it helped.
Oh that helps.
She did not think it helped.
Somehow (don't ask how, precisely), Bobby had gotten ahold of Topher's phone. And after squinting at the text messages, was dialing Kitty.
"I wouldn't worry too much," he said into her voicemailor directly to her if she wanted to pick up, whichever. "He volunteered. And he's got this whole healing thing going on, so..."
"I wouldn't worry too much," he said into her voicemail
Oh, she totally picked up. Yes she did.
"And how drunk is he? Or you?" she asked... tiny Bobby. God, this was still weird sometimes.
Because if everyone was sober she'd totally be asking Warren if he wanted to do this for game night. Drunk, not so much.
"And how drunk is he? Or you?" she asked... tiny Bobby. God, this was still weird sometimes.
Because if everyone was sober she'd totally be asking Warren if he wanted to do this for game night. Drunk, not so much.
"Uh," Bobby frowned, trying to think that out. "Very? But it's cool. We don't get hangovers."
You and Warren didn't get hangovers, Bobby. Everyone else on the other hand...
You and Warren didn't get hangovers, Bobby. Everyone else on the other hand...
"I'm going to laugh really hard when I hear radio with everyone hating themselves in the morning," Kitty said.
Except Bobby and Warren.
Except Bobby and Warren.
"Oh, the chances of us waking up on island are... slim," Bobby confessed. "Once we ended up in Madripoor. And another time we were in Canada."
"...Where are you now?" she checked, suddenly worried she was talking to someone in Timbuktu or something.
"Ummm, the Drunken Unicorn," Bobby admitted. "Buuuut there might be some safari plans later? I think Tony and Ben are gathering tiki torches."
"You guys have way more fun than I do."
Yes. Yes, they did.
Yes. Yes, they did.
"Yeah, we really do," Bobby said shamelessly. "Hey! Hey! You and me should hang out more before I go back home. Sometime."
"Sure. I have no life, so I'm always around," she said. Okay, that wasn't entirely true, but she said it anyway. "Just let me know when."
"Kitty. It's Derek. I need you to come bail me out of jail. Beacon Hills, California." Derek you're just so loquacious.
D&D WORLD CHAMPION FOREVER, said the first text.
Why? Who knew.
whats it like to swim intangibly?
Why? Who knew.
whats it like to swim intangibly?
Well that was a random mix of texts.
It's not really like swimming... Why?
It's not really like swimming... Why?
Nice long pause after that one. Then:
i dont know
Okay, Topher. Okay.
but like you cant drown/? (for science
i dont know
Okay, Topher. Okay.
but like you cant drown/? (for science
And yet not the weirdest text conversation she'd ever had.
I could if I stopped phasing while underwater. How is this for science?
I could if I stopped phasing while underwater. How is this for science?
ohhh, said the next text. dont do that.
Sage advice from the drunk teenager who still had vegetable cake on his shirt.
As for the science part, well: you're research! congratulations you are a good test subject
Oh dear.
Sage advice from the drunk teenager who still had vegetable cake on his shirt.
As for the science part, well: you're research! congratulations you are a good test subject
Oh dear.
Was going to say we should do D&D again... now worried you're going to try and drown me.
this is about other intangible people, Topher assured her. and underwater D&D would be veRy boring
Pretty sure she meant on land, Topher.
Pretty sure she meant on land, Topher.
1. What other intangible ppl? 2. Underwater D&D = awesome, ty. 3. NO DROWNING ANYONE.
a. IDK but i bet there are some 2. but i cant swim :( C) OF COURSE theres no one here i dont like.
Well. That was... Revealing.
Well. That was... Revealing.
Edited 2013-05-02 22:03 (UTC)
on land!!!!! Topher agreed. Using possibly every emoticon his phone offered. Even the ones of little smiley faces eating ice cream and fighting other smiley faces. we are good planners were like team players
Pause.
wait thats an actual thing
Pause.
wait thats an actual thing
Edited 2013-05-02 22:39 (UTC)
Yes we are and yes it is. A lot to drink?
Lets all he glad she figured it out and didn't think he just texted like this.
Lets all he glad she figured it out and didn't think he just texted like this.
very a lot.
He included a photo of some drunken antics as proof. Warren should really stop attempting to fly around the room at Platinum Guy speed without armor on...
He included a photo of some drunken antics as proof. Warren should really stop attempting to fly around the room at Platinum Guy speed without armor on...
Edited 2013-05-02 23:09 (UTC)
[From here!]
"Wrong number. Try again, and this time remind her of the resources we have on the island to make up for her collection. We have book stores and a great library. Help her do something about it instead of apologizing for humanity."
"Wrong number. Try again, and this time remind her of the resources we have on the island to make up for her collection. We have book stores and a great library. Help her do something about it instead of apologizing for humanity."
Edited 2013-05-17 11:45 (UTC)
"Hey Kitty, it's me. Uh, I wish I could say I would have rather done this in person, but I think if I did this in person I might not have left. So, I got a mission, and I'm hoping it's only going to be for a day or two, but it might be longer than that. Like, a lot longer. Like, I might not be back, and I thought if that was going to happen I'd have more time, but I don't so... I'm sorry, I should have written this stuff down before calling... I love you, I want to say that now before I forget. If I'm not back in a few days, can you take care of Lucky? If you don't want him, I understand. Let April take him 'cause she probably won't mind another dog and she'll know what to do with him. Look out for Stiles, and don't be too nice to Derek because keeping him in line is going to be all on you now. Try not to be too pissed at me, okay? I never thought I was going to regret this operation but--I'm sorry. I made a mess and I have to clean it up, and I think I can do it but I just don't know. Just know I'm going to try to get back, okay? Even if it takes a while, just try to remember that.
Flight 225, non-stop to Madripoor, is now boarding at Gate C22. Remember, only one carry-on item is allowed--
Fuck. Okay sweetheart, I've got to go, I don't have more time to... I've just got to go now. Take care of yourself, okay? I love you."
Flight 225, non-stop to Madripoor, is now boarding at Gate C22. Remember, only one carry-on item is allowed--
Fuck. Okay sweetheart, I've got to go, I don't have more time to... I've just got to go now. Take care of yourself, okay? I love you."
As far as Stiles concerned it had only been about two or so hours since he had been barfed up by the nogitsune. Beacon Hills time had slowed to a halt, not that he knew that. He had holed himself up in his room, refusing to see anybody but Melissa for the moment. He didn't need werewolves up in his grill trying to take his pain. And he was in a lot of it.
So in the downtime he had before he pulled himself together and got to trying to form a plan to get Lydia, he sent out some texts he owed.
The nogitsune is out of me but he's still wearing my face. Not planning to come back until it's all taken care of so RUN AWAY if you see anybody that looks like me on island.
So in the downtime he had before he pulled himself together and got to trying to form a plan to get Lydia, he sent out some texts he owed.
The nogitsune is out of me but he's still wearing my face. Not planning to come back until it's all taken care of so RUN AWAY if you see anybody that looks like me on island.
The reply was pretty much immediate. Not that she'd been checking her phone a lot or anything.
Not a problem. Are you okay??
Not a problem. Are you okay??
No, I'm really not. Nogitsune took Lydia, we have no idea where she is
You'll find her. I'm sure of that.
Whether or not she'd be okay was another matter that Kitty was not getting into.
Whether or not she'd be okay was another matter that Kitty was not getting into.
Well at least one of them was sure.
I hope so. At least nobody else has died since I talked to you last.
Aw, Stiles, you jinxed it.
I hope so. At least nobody else has died since I talked to you last.
Aw, Stiles, you jinxed it.
Bright side. I mean, you not being possessed anymore is a pretty great bright side too.
I guess. Didn't feel like a bright side considering the amount of pain he was currently in. Stay safe, okay?
I'll do my best. Because at this point he fully expected to be possessed again.
Hey, Kitty, you had a text!
Jessica Drew here. FYI my version of you punched Galactus in the face. Long story. Horrible destruction but world is safe. Galactus stuck in Negative Zone w/ nothing to eat.
Jessica Drew here. FYI my version of you punched Galactus in the face. Long story. Horrible destruction but world is safe. Galactus stuck in Negative Zone w/ nothing to eat.
Did nooot expect that text.
Glad to hear it. High five me for me.
Glad to hear it. High five me for me.
[From here]
Look. I don't know who the fuck this is but if you're impersonated my mom and humped my dad you should know he once had the plague and you should get yourself checked out.
Look. I don't know who the fuck this is but if you're impersonated my mom and humped my dad you should know he once had the plague and you should get yourself checked out.
[From here!]
Look, Sparkle couldn't help it if Jessica's message brought out his ridiculous side. Really, this week, he could use a little ridiculous, anyway.
"If I find out what it is you think I think I know, I'll let you know, okay? Eh? Know what I mean? Know what I mean? Nudge nudge. Nudge nudge. Know what I mean? Say no more... know what I mean?"
Well, that had fallen apart quickly.
Look, Sparkle couldn't help it if Jessica's message brought out his ridiculous side. Really, this week, he could use a little ridiculous, anyway.
"If I find out what it is you think I think I know, I'll let you know, okay? Eh? Know what I mean? Know what I mean? Nudge nudge. Nudge nudge. Know what I mean? Say no more... know what I mean?"
Well, that had fallen apart quickly.
[from here.]
"I kinda don't want to leave a message after your message about leaving messages, but yeah, we're totally fine. Why wouldn't we be? Is someone messing with you? 'Cause if they are, say the word, and I'll ... bring a succubus to the gunfight. Call me!"
"I kinda don't want to leave a message after your message about leaving messages, but yeah, we're totally fine. Why wouldn't we be? Is someone messing with you? 'Cause if they are, say the word, and I'll ... bring a succubus to the gunfight. Call me!"
[From here]
"Er. You're very attractive, and you're a great friend, and if you're that interested in a threesome, we could hit Emma up for drinks next time she's in town and see what she says?"
"Er. You're very attractive, and you're a great friend, and if you're that interested in a threesome, we could hit Emma up for drinks next time she's in town and see what she says?"
Edited 2015-04-02 02:29 (UTC)
[From here]
"Wait, are you sure you're not pregnant? Cause you know, babies can be tricky. Can't trust 'em!"
"Wait, are you sure you're not pregnant? Cause you know, babies can be tricky. Can't trust 'em!"
Edited 2015-04-02 05:39 (UTC)
No one had warned Steve that the phones could go crazy. Poor Steve.
He returned the message as well as he was able.
"I know this is the future and all, but I don't need strangers callin' me up to...volunteer their assets at me, even after dinner."
There's a looooong pause.
"Is this a booty call?? I read about those! But no. Still...no."
He returned the message as well as he was able.
"I know this is the future and all, but I don't need strangers callin' me up to...volunteer their assets at me, even after dinner."
There's a looooong pause.
"Is this a booty call?? I read about those! But no. Still...no."
[[ from here ]]
"I'd say you have bigger problems if you know anyone who's chewin' their drinks, mate," Edward said, dubiously. He might have forgotten about last time. "You don't want to be boilin' and chillin' anything that's got fat in it, for starters."
"I'd say you have bigger problems if you know anyone who's chewin' their drinks, mate," Edward said, dubiously. He might have forgotten about last time. "You don't want to be boilin' and chillin' anything that's got fat in it, for starters."
[[from here]
"In no way have I rubbed anything in. And even if I did, aren't you getting married? What is wrong with everyone today?" There was a pause before. "Wait, how are you sending me a voicemail?"
"In no way have I rubbed anything in. And even if I did, aren't you getting married? What is wrong with everyone today?" There was a pause before. "Wait, how are you sending me a voicemail?"
(From here)
"What is it with everyone wanting to have sex with me today? Also, I don't break out knives unless asked very, very nicely and trust the person. For the record and all."
"What is it with everyone wanting to have sex with me today? Also, I don't break out knives unless asked very, very nicely and trust the person. For the record and all."
Hey, so I was thinking: should we keep the tank around, like, just in case? Hank says we shouldn't put real fish in it just in case you eat them if that thing happens again, but maybe there's, I dunno? Robot fish or something we could get to make it look nice?
It always threw Summer way off when people left voicemails, even more so when it wasn't one of her parents, and message itself didn't help matters much, but she was intrigued.
"Yeah, hi," she said, "I don't really know who this is, either, but what I do know is that I can make absolutely no promises about the effeciveness or volume of my explosions. But I can guarantee shit'll get blown up. So what are we talking here? What are we exploding, when, and where? Call me back, I guess?
"Or you could just, you know, text me like a normal person."
"Yeah, hi," she said, "I don't really know who this is, either, but what I do know is that I can make absolutely no promises about the effeciveness or volume of my explosions. But I can guarantee shit'll get blown up. So what are we talking here? What are we exploding, when, and where? Call me back, I guess?
"Or you could just, you know, text me like a normal person."
Okay. It was a weird message to get so Jessica responded in her typical manner:
I don't know who you are but you're too young for me and I can probably drink you under the table. Also if you try to give me highlights I'll murder you in your sleep.
I don't know who you are but you're too young for me and I can probably drink you under the table. Also if you try to give me highlights I'll murder you in your sleep.
What the fuck year was this? Why was anything related to Duke Crocker and Hot Leaf Water existing on her phone right now?
No shit, Sherlock. Tell me something I don't know.
No shit, Sherlock. Tell me something I don't know.
Edited 2021-04-01 15:41 (UTC)
Page 1 of 2