The safehouse in South Carolina- Tuesday

[throughaphase]

In the world Wanda had built for everybody, this last weekend would have been Clint and Kitty's wedding. Instead of being weird and awkward about it in Fandom, they'd taken the dogs and headed for Clint's safehouse, and stayed for slightly longer than intended because SDCC. While Kitty wasn't sure she felt better about the whole situation that they had been specifically not talking about, at least there'd been the distractions.

And on the last day, she'd procrastinated on packing enough to walk outside to the beach, where she could sit for a little bit without any squirrels spying on her.

[For the boy!]

Comments

[throughaphase]

"It really was," she said, leaning against him as much as she could with the dogs here. "Not really ready to go back to real life yet."

[so_hawkward]

"Yeah, I know, me neither," Clint said. "But who knows what Tino is getting up to without your guiding hand? He and the zombies could be doing terrible things to your business."

[throughaphase]

"And the mansion's probably blown up at least once," Kitty added, pulling Rook into her lap because she was smaller.

[so_hawkward]

Clint chose to focus his attention on Lucky's belly with scratches. "And who knows what the island's been doing to people. I wonder if my students missed me. Probably not."

[throughaphase]

"I'd say probably yes. If only because you give them an excuse to go to the beach," Kitty said. "I'd have been all over that at their age."

Plus, arms.

[so_hawkward]

"I guess. The beach is usually pretty quiet. Not quite as quiet as this though," Clint said. "But that's the nice part about being out here. This was always a good spot to decompress."

[throughaphase]

"And we needed it," Kitty said honestly. "Do we need to have a talk before we leave?" Might as well ask.

[so_hawkward]

"I don't know. Do you want to have a talk?" So mature, Clint.

[throughaphase]

"Not really. But I don't want stuff to follow us back home and make things weird, either," Kitty admitted.

[so_hawkward]

"Okay, you have a point," Clint said, turning to look at Kitty fully. "Are you doing okay? I know there's kind of a... lingering weird from everything that happened when we were at home for you."

[throughaphase]

Kitty shrugged, focusing a little more on petting Rook. "Not really," she said again. "We were happy there. I didn't have to deal with rampant discrimination or ever be tempted to hide what I am. And then all of a sudden my real world's hit with the worst case scenario and everything's terrible, and I'm stuck with all these ideas for us that aren't happening. Guess it's just hitting me harder than I thought it would."

[so_hawkward]

"I'm sorry," Clint said sympathetically. "I know things at home are awful and I wish like hell I could fix them. As for us... I think we're in a good place. We're living together, sharing dogs--I know it's not the same but I'm really happy with you. Does that help at all?"

[throughaphase]

"It does. And I'm happy with you, too," Kitty said quickly, because she didn't want him to think she wasn't. "It's just... one minute we're getting married, the next we're not. It feels a little like going backwards even if we didn't, you know?"

And it really bothered her that only a few months ago she'd have been fine staying as is if he wasn't comfortable moving forward, and then this whole stupid thing changed her mind so fast.

[so_hawkward]

"Yeah, I know. I feel the same way. If you'd told me that I'd ever be excited about planning a wedding, I don't know if I'd believe you," he said, cracking a smile. "Would it help if I said... I don't know, I can see that happening? I mean, we already talk about Lexi like she's practically real."

[throughaphase]

"It would," she said, definitely not looking at him now. "But when no new mutants are even being born now I'm not sure she would even happen anymore." Which was another thing that had been nagging at her since everything happened.

[so_hawkward]

Oh, Clint hadn't even thought of that. "Hey, we've still got my world. And Fandom," he said. "You don't--we can't assume she won't happen. If anything, you deserve to be happy now more than ever."

[throughaphase]

"You'd think," she said wryly. "We could still have kids, but at least until we know more about what Wanda did, it wouldn't really be Lexi as we know her. And then I feel kind of stupid being upset over losing all this stuff I never even had."

[so_hawkward]

"It's not stupid. It's not stuff you've never had, it's stuff you've gotten a look at that you just don't have yet," Clint said. He reached over and tried to take Kitty's hand to give it a squeeze. "Who knows, maybe Wanda can reverse what she did, or fix it. There's always hope, at least with me."

[throughaphase]

Kitty bit her lip. "Would now be a bad time to tell you she seems to have depowered herself?"

[so_hawkward]

Clint sighed and squeezed Kitty's hand again. "Okay, maybe someone else can reverse it. Or fix Wanda or--something, I don't know."

[throughaphase]

"Maybe," she said, and while she didn't sound convinced, she squeezed his hand back. "How are you doing with all of this?"

[so_hawkward]

"I'm okay, but I didn't lose as much," Clint pointed out. "And I was thinking about how some stuff could have been worse. Like, if we'd actually been stuck in that other world for a while, and we went through with getting married, it would have been a lot worse to come back to the real world."

[throughaphase]

"True," she conceded. "And if we'd known what was happening and had to stay, we'd have to have the world's most awkward 'where is this relationship going?' talk ever."

[so_hawkward]

Clint laughed softly. "See, I just keep telling myself that it could have been worse. I could have lost you somehow, or you could have lost your powers. I know it's not much but it's what's keeping me going."

[throughaphase]

"Sorry you had to get caught up in all of this," Kitty sighed. "It can't be easy."

[so_hawkward]

"It hasn't been easy, you're right. But if my choices are dealing with stuff like this or not being with you, I'm gonna pick you every time so..." Clint trailed off with a shrug.

[throughaphase]

"I really don't deserve you," Kitty decided after mulling his words over for a moment.

[so_hawkward]

Clint snorted at that. "There's a lot of people who would disagree with you there," he said, "including me. I'm the one who doesn't deserve you."

[throughaphase]

"You put up with a lot of crap from my world, and you stick around," Kitty said. "I can't think of anyone else who would do that."

[so_hawkward]

"You're worth it," Clint insisted. "Completely, 100 percent worth it."

[throughaphase]

This conversation had been a really good idea. "Better watch out. Talk like that, I might just marry you for real someday," she teased.